Captain Crunch,
A man of glee
For breakfast, lunch,
I’ll munch on thee
Aboard his ship,
The S.S. Guppy
On sea you’ll float,
If you’re so lucky
And search the seas,
Look far and wide
For Crunch Berries,
To steal and hide
Upon your tongue,
You’ll plant the seed
One berry clung,
but was not freed
Into your gut,
the berry fell
And cried in anguish,
Just as well
For it knew that,
When it had left
Its berry flavor,
Now bereft
And though it cries,
and you just smile
Where berry lies,
There’s just a pile
A husk of food,
A man distraught
And though he fought,
And fought, and fought
There’d be no light,
Be no reprieve
From those who might,
Seek to deceive
And now it’s done,
Come to an end
And there’s just one,
Who can amend
But you look proud,
With puffed-out chest:
“I’ve done it now,
I am the best!”