why

i cannot for the life of me discern what exactly it is i am trying to say anymore–i have, time and time again, deleted and rewritten this post. it has been two hours now, and i refuse to allow myself to rebuff this post’s submission any further. i have toyed with the idea of simply…

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Solitary Berry

Captain Crunch, A man of glee For breakfast, lunch, I’ll munch on thee Aboard his ship, The S.S. Guppy On sea you’ll float, If you’re so lucky And search the seas, Look far and wide For Crunch Berries, To steal and hide   Upon your tongue, You’ll plant the seed One berry clung, but was…

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クランチ様の俳句 2

クランチ様が最初ガッピーに航海した時に、下の俳句を書きになりました。 海の中 ガッピーにいる 幸せな

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The Death of Crunch (cont’d.)

When there is a death in the family, and all has been prepared for their departure, the deceased is more alive than they ever were when alive; that there even exists such a ritual sendoff (be it by way of funeral, cremation, alkaline hydrolysis–the list goes on) lends credence to a notion of mine–that, in…

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Eucharistic Horatiatic Postmortem Impermanence

Captain Crunch exists. This is my final stand, both against myself and those around me who would think me as covetously grasping to a fiction. So quick to jump to conclusions, people are; and yet, even in the face of finite, categorical, epistemologically unchallengeable outcomes, people can deny the truth. My friends and colleagues have…

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Experimenting With Crunch

I write this brief post to inform our beloved reader base of a new innovation in the Captain Crunch Colloquium (CCC): Captain Crunch Cereal in pickle brine. Hear me out for a second, my most certainly now-disgusted reader–You would be remiss to click away from this post now before trying this combination. As my grandmother…

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