The Cap’n’s Crunchy Crew

It is no secret that Cap’n Horatio Magellan Crunch is the Captain of the Guppy. Though no matter how great a ship’s captain is, every ship needs a crew.

I have taken the liberty of translating Crunch’s ship manifests, and listing the names and, if available, the descriptions of the crew members below.

Smedley

Smedley is the resident elephant of the Guppy. Smedley was a gift given to Crunch by the people of the subcontinent of India, as a “thank you” for introducing crunchberries to them. Smedley is Jean LaFoote’s greatest nightmare, and Crunch uses that against him when in dire straits. Smedley can be seen on early packages of Peanut Butter Crunch.

Capn Crunch Smedley character card

Crunchberry Beast (Name changed from “Crunch Beast” after release of Crunchberry flavor)

Little is known about Crunchberry Beast’s origins, though one thing is certain: it is not human or crunchling. Though despite this, Crunchberry Beast was found on Crunch Island playing with crunchlings, believing them-self to be a crunchling as well. Crunchberry Beast has proven to be a powerful ally to Horatio, often sharing the hidden secrets of the craved crunchberry. As such, Crunchberry Beast appeared frequently on early versions of the Crunchberry flavor cereal box.

Crunchberry Beast card

Seadog

If dogs are man’s best friend, then Seadog is Horatio’s best friend. Seadog is the 2nd-in-command on the Guppy, and valuable protector of Horatio’s many treasures.  While some may consider Seadog and Smedley to be Horatio’s pets, we at CrunchFacts actually have concluded that the relationship is not one of pet and owner, but of friend and friend with white mustache.

capn crunch seadog

Carlyle

The youngest member of the Guppy‘s crew, Carlyle is known by his signature sweet tooth, used for munching the crunchberries.

Australia capn crunch carlyle
Horatio and Carlyle on their annual trip to Australia.

Bertha (Magnolia Bulkhead?)

Not much is known about Bertha (in fact, even her name is uncertain. It appears she has gone by the alias Magnolia Bulkhead), but she seems to have an affinity for the Cap’n himself. Every time she is pictured,  we see her with lust in her eyes and visible hearts flowing around her.

bertha or magnolia bulkhead

Alfie

One of the many children on the Guppy. Known as the brains of the crew, and easily recognizable by his glasses.

crunch money alfie
Alfie and Brunhilde on one of the world’s most valuable currencies, Crunch Money. 1CM is equal to about 823USD.

Brunhilde

One of the many children on the Guppy, identifiable by her signature blonde hair. Possibly next in line in the chain of command after Seadog.

Brunhilde and Capn Crunch
Brunhilde can be seen here being taught by Horatio that peeping is okay, as long as you use the 1-minute rule.

Dave

One of the many children on the Guppy. Not the sweetest crunchberry, if you catch my drift, but loyal to a fault. Seen above with the large gap in his teeth.

Dave Capn Crunch

1 reply to The Cap’n’s Crunchy Crew

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s